Explaining Cars to Non-Car People

"Matthew Keyser" (teisco15) 04/08/2014 at 01:44 • Filed to: None

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When you start devoting any amount of time to a certain subject, It becomes a hobby. Hobbies are good. Hobbies have inspired the creation of businesses and fueled relationships. However, with any hobby, there will always be the doubters. The people that question what you are doing. They question the benefits from said hobby and the reasoning behind it. I was confronted with one of these doubters just a few days ago. "What is the deal with you and cars?" they said. Or would've said if I hadn't cut them off after 2 words.

Car guys become car guys from experience, from heritage. Car guys generally come from a long line of car guys. Grandpa had a 1963 Corvette that your dad rode in as a kid until grandpa sold it. Your dad subsequently spent the majority of his adult life looking for said 1963 Corvette to restore with you, his son, to continue the car guy chain. It's a hereditary disease that causes you to giggle like a school girl every time you are within a couple of feet of a revving big block. You are constantly looking for reasons to show off the hard work you put into your car to strangers. Being asked to explain such a connection was baffling. It was like being asked "Why do you like eating food that tastes good?" There had to be some way to get it through to him.

"So basically, cars are propelled along by little explosions!" I exclaimed, hoping to capture his attention. He responded to this by checking the Blackhawks score on his iPhone. So far this was not going well. "Cars are freedom! You can go anywhere in a car!" I explained losing hope. "Good luck driving to Europe from here." he replied in an uninterested mumble. "I just don't get it, all cars are the same!" This obviously was not going well, but his idea of entertainment is watching a bunch of glorified figure skaters beating the crap out of each other on ice. What did he know.

This called for drastic measures. It was road trip time. We were only going on a few hour day trip, but surely a few hours in a fun car with 2 car guys would be enough to capture his attention at least right? We picked him up in my fathers new Audi. He got in the back seat only to ask where the cup holders were. He had previously displayed an interest in going fast meaning he wasn't a totally lost cause. My father was driving, there were a few minutes of silence only broken by me or my dad pointing out a cool or rare car to which my friend responded "Yeah man! Cars! They have like 4 wheels and stuff!" very sarcastically. It was time to show him why cars were fun. Approaching an on ramp, my dad pulled the down paddle a few times and nailed it. A long, banked, swooping right transitioning into a gradual left while merging at a speed slightly over the legal limit pretty much anywhere. He was pushed back in his seat and then thrown violently to the side with a large, childish grin.

We had done it. We had cracked him. He may never have the same passion or ever attend a car show. He will probably never work on a car or giggle at the sound of an engine, but he now had an understanding. It just goes to show that there is a little car guy in all of us, it's just a matter of unleashing it.

So what are some techniques you have used to explain your love for cars? What are some of your similar stories? Is there anything else I should have tried? Let me know in the comments below.

beardsbynelly - Rikerbeard > Matthew Keyser 04/08/2014 at 02:32

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About 6 or 7 years ago I had a housemate who was into fishing and not into cars. I wasn't really into fishing at the time, but I never turn down an excuse to blast down the coast roads.
We planned a weekend where we'd meet a few mutual friends on the way and all stay at a rented house, We were going to take his ute because I was a little worried about fish guts getting in the boot carpet, interestingly enough, his ute developed a misfire a week before the trip.
We test fitted his largest rod and it fit in my sw20r MR2 with the roof off, and we could put the tackle in the frunk where I can hose it out afterwards if anything spills.I bought new tyres and brake pads in anticipation, and spent the Friday bedding them in to make sure everything was ready.
queue 2 hours of fairly standard highway driving to get to the mountain road that headed down to the coast, he complained once or twice as we got stuck behind a sheep truck and you couldn't escape the smell with the roof off. Though he enjoyed the looks and smiles we got as people laughed at fishing rods sticking out through the roof.Finally we got to the twisty mountain road, Sadly it wasn't long until we were stuck behind two caravans and an old Volvo 240, My housemate to the left of me started telling me that there was no point getting a sports car because you never get a chance to wind it out legally.

It was during this tirade that the two caravans pulled over into a short slow vehicle lane, taking my opportunity I down shifted and passed them, I only got up to around 5000rpm before having to slow back down behind the 240GL. "See! No matter how quick your car is there'll always be someone slow.." I didn't hear the rest as I downshift to 2nd, indicate, cross broken lines, 7000rpm, shift up, pass Volvo, indicate back into lane, 100kph, left foot brake, heel-toe back down to 2 nd , approaching hair pin with 25kph suggested limit. current speed 60kph and slowing, I can hear something from the left of me say 'Jesus' as I hit the apex at 45kph while staying in my lane and power out. My housemate is laughing as I let off the throttle and short shift into 4th. The rest of the mountain pass was clear but I kept it tame but spirited as I was worried about speed traps and kangaroos. That was a good day, didn't catch any fish that weekend but I think I converted him.

Svend > Matthew Keyser 04/08/2014 at 02:52

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Try explaining valeting/detailing to both car and non car people. They just shake their heads and say how pathetic it is and ask why a s self service wash or drive through car wash isn't okay as it'll just get dirty again. Everyone likes a clean or moderately clean car but have no interest in going any further. Even trainspotters have a better rep than we do and if I have to hear another person say 'you can do mine next', 'its only going to rain in a few hours, why bother', 'you missed a bit', 'it'll only get dirty again' or 'you'll wash the paint away', I'll scream and spray them with iron fallout remover.

deadlypixels > Matthew Keyser 04/08/2014 at 04:47

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Thanks for the stories guys! Always fun to hear peoples experiences.

The man in the iron mask > Matthew Keyser 04/08/2014 at 04:59

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You got a make things easier man, get a manual Rwd rev the engine and dump the clutch.
Go sideways, and shift second gear. You get him scared or you get the same grin your friend had.

zeontestpilot > Matthew Keyser 04/08/2014 at 07:01

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Good story, though I have to argue with the heritage in cars thing. I'm 27 now and have only been interested in cars for a couple years. Cars in my family were a commodity, something to get you around town. My grandpa dragged raced cars, but he instilled a love of computers in me instead. My interested in cars started when I was a bagger at Publix. I saw Lamborghini's, lotus's, rx8, and I had to ask some people, "what car is that?" . My fathers an engineer, so I can appreciate a good body design. After I purchased my first car (still have it), a '08 pt cruiser, bought for (a future family car), I researched it to know all that I can about, I wanted to know what I drove. In my research I learn new things like fwd/awd/etc, the fun of a stick, and this amazing website! From starting off knowing nothing, I've learned a lot about cars. Soon learned my cruiser is madly dislikd too, but there's a certin level of respected for your 1st car, right?

Also, I'm now the crazy guy in the family that talks about nothing except video games (my major) and cars.

spanfucker retire bitch > Matthew Keyser 04/08/2014 at 09:38

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This obviously was not going well, but his idea of entertainment is watching a bunch of glorified figure skaters beating the crap out of each other on ice. What did he know.

Awww, hell naw. You did not just fucking insult Hockey. Them's fighten' words.

On topic however, I know how you feel. I get roughly the same reaction for the technology that I have. I run my own NAS/server for the home. I have an HTPC and a desktop that I built. I have a high-end portable workstation laptop. People look at me with complete bewilderment as to why I still even have a desktop - much less the fact that I built it (and I won't even go in to their reactions when I tell them how much I spent).

People just don't understand when it's a hobby they have no interest in. You might as well be speaking Latin to them.

awe46m3zcp > Matthew Keyser 04/08/2014 at 10:19

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Sports fanatics are the hardest to convert. Take my brother in law for example. He could name every quarterback, every pitcher, every coach for every team AND write their autobiography. But cars are just silly to him. I've tried my best as he drives 75K miles a year (4 state territory in sales). He's perfectly happy doing that in the worst cars possible. No desire for any luxuries like bluetooth, or heated seats.

He once came over and his tires were looking LOW. I mentioned it to him so he asked me to check them. ALL of them had less than 10lbs of air. I got a little ticked and told him that they need to be checked every once in a while, and that he is putting my sisters and nephews life at risk driving around like that. About a year later they came over again, and my sister mentions they had to stop for air on the way because he was embarrassed last visit. I decided to check the pressures and they all had above 70lbs in them.. #facepalm.

jalop1991 > Svend 04/12/2014 at 17:12

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Try explaining valeting/detailing to both car OCD and non car OCD people.

There, I fixed it for you.

Svend > jalop1991 04/13/2014 at 02:09

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Cheers mate. I get that a lot. People ask me if I could clean their car for them and I say "ye', no problem", so they ask when and I say "as early as you can make it", to which the reply is always "why? How long is it going to take you?" to which my answer is always "eight hours for exterior and anything from half an hour to three hours for the interior depending on how bad it is and whether its a vacuum and dress job or a seat or two needs scrubbing from a spill". Then they ask for a quick wash then which three hours unless its a re-clean from the last six weeks in which case it'll only take half an hour, an hour if it needs any attention here and there.

Maybe you might have a point with the OCD when I think about it! :)

945T > The man in the iron mask 04/13/2014 at 03:50

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totally. My friend is sports all the time all day. Never held a license. We came to a closed road once on a night road trip (which he enjoyed doing) and he goes "Oh, the road up the mountain is closed, you'll have to turn around"

I go "Guess so..." Rev the motor twice quickly (VRUUM VRUUUUUUUUUUUM) and do a 180° power slide and burn out all the way through first, second, and chirp into third doing over the limit. He was laughing hysterically like a little kid, and suddenly my old turbo Volvo was the coolest car he had ever been in. And his dad used to race Porsches.

David muscleguy > beardsbynelly - Rikerbeard 04/13/2014 at 16:00

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Dude that's one hell of story! i wish i can meet you one day and do some MADNESS:)

beardsbynelly - Rikerbeard > David muscleguy 04/13/2014 at 20:28

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I tell the story even better after a couple of beers.